It is so funny how we must balance our lives by setting boundaries about what we want, but also being flexible for the right person, place or circumstance. I think of this today as I look for apartments because I was e-mailed by a landlord about a house who in her ad said NO PETS. I replied and told her I had a dog so it was probably not the right match, but she said for the right person and the right dog she would make an exception. It leaves me wondering what makes the "right" person.

I think that this happens in all aspects of life: housing, work, relationships. We put up boundaries based on our experience and where we are at in our lives and then have to readjust for each new opportunity and interaction. What are the things we can tolerate and what are the things that we can't? Often it is a combination of things that makes something or someone tolerable or not. 

I am a firm believer in boundaries and that when one knows what one wants it is easier to get, but I also realize that desires change, circumstances change and with this change has to come a reevaluation of what I think I want. I would prefer to live alone, but at the same time, I would live with the right roommates. It is just about being open to the right people when they end up in the right place at the right time. And on the other hand acknowledging when the timing isn't right and the person or place is wrong.

Priorities also come into play at this point, what is more important, not living with a dog or finding an awesome roommate with a dog. Knowing our capacity and how we feel at any given moment in time is important in making the best decisions for ourselves and those that come into our world. Being honest and open about where we are and what we want, how flexible we can be and what are the issues we cannot bend on is crucial to finding the connections that are right.