Things that we do cause others pain. Sometimes this is done on purpose, other times we are unaware. The fact that people are often not honest with each other only adds to the amount of pain given and received. I read, "When You Reach Me" by Rebecca Stead today, in the story the main character Miranda's mother tells her that people wear veils as a way to stay happy. This veil allows them to see only a part of what actually exists in reality, but that sometimes the wind blows this veil and they get a glimpse of the world as it is. Some also learn to lift the veil themselves so that they can see reality more often. This seems somehow accurate. Most people choose not to see. They remain blind to the suffering of others, to their part in it, and to their own heartache. It is hard to lift the veil, it requires that one be prepared to see the pain of others, to see our role in their pain, and to see and acknowledge our own. Healing from and taking responsibility for pain requires the lifting of the veil. This allows growth, instead of withdrawal into oneself - connection instead of isolation - deep and meaningful relationships instead of interactions based on a history of hurt.